If you are sleeping with a psychopath (okay, let’s get real, you’re not just sleeping) there is a good chance that you’ve been (1) groomed and (2) courted by the psycho, and depending on where you are at in this psychopathic relationship, either you are (3) head over heels in love, or you were and now you’re (4) wondering what the hell is going on. Or, if the relationship has run its course, it is clear that (5) you’ve been played, you have suffered the effects of this entanglement, and to your psychopath’s amusement, you are in a great deal of pain, and are devasted from the experience. I've just finished this book and I have mixed feelings on it. I felt as though it was really a book of two halves and I find myself with different opinions on the beginning and the end. The second part of the book is a monotonous description of the police investigation - really it is just Carolyn complaining about how the police handled the case. It’s so easy to say “I wouldn’t do that” or “couldn’t she see what was happening” but I was able to understand why Carolyn did allow herself to be dragged down this murky path. Simply put, she fell head over heels in love with a professional conman. A man who had spent most of his life honing his craft, learning how to read people and press the right buttons to get exactly what he wanted and to make his victims fall for his lies. This is a fascinating tale as well as a warning to unsuspecting women of how easily life can come unravelled. Now that's not to say I didn't approach the read with a certain amount of scepticism, after all I'm really not sure I'd hand over vast sums of money to someone I'd not long met even though I have to take Carolyn's assertions that it was different if you were there.

There were also some quite frustrating aspects of the book too. She makes a really big deal about how she doesn't want to be painted as the 'divorced woman' as this comes with some negative connotations - yet it's the beginning of the strap-line in the front of the book - which I presume she signed off on. She also expresses her frustration with the GPs she saw who insisted she needed antidepressants and therapy because she didn't want either. I really don't understand what else she wanted from them, what else could they offer? You’re right. It is totally extraordinary. My life is like a film; you couldn’t make it up … But there’s something I have to tell you,’ he confided, as he leaned across the table towards me. ‘I’m not normal.’ In the beginning, the psychopath befriends you and becomes your most trusted friend. They draw you in by sharing intimate details about themselves and expect you to reveal your intimate secrets in kind. Only the intimate details they are sharing with you are either totally fictitious or greatly exaggerated, and yours are the painful truth. You’ve been longing to find someone you can talk to that you can trust with these details, so you do… Your psychopath is storing this information to be used as a weapon against you later. In the meantime, this sharing of intimate (secret) details draws you closer to the psychopath’s web. 2. You Are Courted by the PsychopathI wanted to like this book. I'm a fan of thrillers and true crime podcasts and things but this was quite a struggle to get through. The title of this book is a bit misleading in as much as the 'psychopath' of the title never actually spends the night with the author. Forgive me for pointing that out, but it's one of the weird things he does (or rather doesn't do) in a very long list of extremely weird behaviours. She is in love with the 'idea' of the man rather than his reality.

Interestingly the book doesn't stop at the fraud played upon this poor woman, it covers the later police investigation which took far longer than seems reasonable. The second part of the book which covered the investigation was easier to get through and a bit more interesting - perhaps because it was less about her. All in all, I won't be recommending this to anyone unfortunately.One of the main reasons Mark got away with the extent of the fraud he did was due to his charismatic character. From the very first meeting it was clear that he was a bit of a creep and she'd have been best off staying well away from him. I felt those parts were written with the benefit of hindsight and she really failed in her quest to make the reader truly understand what it was that had drawn her to him in the first place - and what made her stay. The nighttime habits of antisocial personalities vary, Dr. Gene Beresin, Executive Director of The Clay Center for Young Healthy Minds at Massachusetts General Hospital, tells Bustle. There's really no one consistent activity or set of activities that all psychopaths do. However, whatever they choose to do, it's going to be self-centered and in the moment. "No matter what else is happening around the individual (even if it is monumental), if it is not immediately relevant to what the psychopath is interested in at that time, it is disregarded," Beresin says. At some point when your psychopath has felt like he or she has built a sufficient trust bond with you, his or her affections turn romantic, as you are overwhelmed by a relentless flood of affectionate attention and proclamation of love, even if you are already in a suitable romantic relationship at the moment. If you are in a relationship with someone else, the psycho will find ways to discredit the person you are in a relationship with now and create mind games that will have you thinking something is desperately wrong. Not surprisingly, you will probably start thinking that the person you love(d) is a “psychopath.” I was really looking forward to this story which promised to be “a real-life thriller”. It turned out to be a fairly tedious and repetitive tale of how a well off, naïve divorcee got duped by a manipulative egomaniac. OMFG so so many alarm bells would have been going off in my head & the behaviour he exhibited in those first 24 hours would have had me running for the hills! Or is it just easy for me to say that having never been in this kinda situation before? I didn't realise this was a true story to start with, so I did a little research & read the news reports...what an absolute uncaring bastard (that's me being polite) he was!

Now that you’ve all but pledged your heart and soul to the psycho, the strangest things will start to occur. You will start to notice inconsistencies, and you will be told, “It’s all in your mind.” And it’s these kinds of mind games that will make you start to wonder if you are of sound mind. How could all this just be from an overactive imagination? Your psychopath’s not being where he or she said they would be at the agreed-upon time, will all be credited to you not remembering the details correctly. And as you start to wonder if the psycho is on the up and up, “How dare you to question the undying love and commitment” your psychopath has for you. He or she would surely take a bullet for you or even give their own life for you (they will say to dispel any questions you might have about their integrity). These inconsistencies are clues that your psychopath is already sizing up his or her next victim, or may already have one on the hook, as he or she prepares for the, 5. Pain and Suffering Associated with Being Played by the Psycho You're right. It is totally extraordinary. My life is like a film; you couldn't make it up ... But there's something I have to tell you,' he confided, as he leaned across the table towards me. 'I'm not normal.' None of us can say for sure that we wouldn't fall the same way. Most of us will think we're too smart to be used like that, but this guy is not so unusual. I've also read both of Mary Turner-Thomson's books about her bigamist/psychopath husband and what he did to her. Inevitably, I find myself playing 'compare and contrast' between the two women's books and, whilst I think this is better written, I was oddly more sympathetic to MTT's case.

Reviews:

I'd 100% recommend listening to Sleeping with a Psychopath as I bet that throughout the book most readers will be asking themselves whether they could fall victim to a similar crime. I don’t want to go into detail, about the lengths he went, you should read that yourself. I read so much with a dropped jaw. I liked the quotes at the start of each chapter that related to what had happened. I have to agree with Carolyn that there is something much deeper with this man. I don’t think there is a cure. It is who he is. Sleeping with a Psychopath by Carolyn Woods is the true story of her life when she met the charismatic, wealthy and handsome Mark Conway and within a matter of weeks Carolyn, a divorcee living in a quiet village, happy with her single life and her friends, finds herself falling head over heels with a stranger and slowly being alienated from everyone and becoming completely dependant both emotionally and financially on Mark. So many red flags. He told her he’d just been shot in the arm, then in the leg. Did she not notice he had no wounds when they were being intimate? The rudeness he showed towards her family would have made most women run for the hills, but she stayed. I think because she, right from the day she met him, loved the luxury champagne and limo lifestyle. What an incredible story this is! Carolyn Woods was a confident 54-year-old woman, divorced and financially well off until she met the man that nightmares is made from. Mark Conway as he introduced himself to Carolyn, was a confident, charismatic conman that walked into her life one day and ruined her financially and emotionally.

I would have said the same around two years ago before my middle aged daughter was scammed, scammed online out of a lot of money, through her trust, her big heart and the cleverness of that other terrible person. Romance scam.

This was in 2012, when there was already so much publicity about conmen and scammers! Yet she actually believed he worked for M16, was friends with every famous person you can think of, was rich enough to buy several airports and fleets of vintage aeroplanes, one day was in Spain, later that day was in Syria, received phone calls from the king of Spain. Come on!